1053

Fresh bread should really be rested for a good half hour (at least) before you cut into it.  With a sharp knife it's not the crust that's the problem, but the crumb inside needs to relax, else it kind of balls up and sticks together if it's still hot.  The smell though, my oh my, one of my favourite aromas in all the world, how can you honestly be expected to resist?

As a child my mum would bake all our bread and insist I waited, probably only a few moments, before she cut the end crust for me.  Most delicious hot, with butter dripping from it, such a treat every single time.  Even now it's my treat.  The girls aren't fans of crust and I haven't bothered selling the virtues of a fresh crust to them because, frankly, I don't want to share!

Now fresh baked rolls, they're crusted all round and have more combined surface area (with a slight bowl like curve) to contain the generous amounts of melting butter that I consider a necessity with my bread.  Sometimes when you cook something, as the cook you give a kind of mmm reaction, as in it's okay, but bread, no my bread gets me every time.

1025

There is a lot of food in my life, in my family's life.

I don't eat much, purely because I don't have a great appetite, but I spend most of my days thinking about food or making it.  Baking, cooking, it's a recreation for me.  A girlfriend asked me how I didn't put on weight with all the cakes I make. The simple answer, I make them but I don't necessarily eat them.

When I make something new I share it with my family and my parents.  I will make some for my mum and dad to try and they do the same in return.  Mum and dad are amazing Indian cooks - creating delicious curries from scratch, roasting spices individually, crushing by hand and the results are amazing.  I, however, don't cook Indian, I mean why do I need to when I have delicious curries delivered to my door each time the  fancy takes my parents?

My lunch today was a delicious Middle Eastern flat pie from this book/blog.  Mum delivered my a little pile for the freezer and they are an amazing lunch ready in as along as they take to defrost in the microwave and slightly crisp in the oven.  I topped with salad and felt warm and cared for while eating it.

Food has always been an expression of love and caring for me, even if it's something as simple as making my husband's vegie toast just right.  I don't eat Vegemite and many years back had to be instructed in the special need to kind of scratch up the bread in the middle with not too much salty spread.  I do it for him because he's special to me.

One of our loved ones is facing a health battle and I want to play my part with food and all the love that I can muster into it.  When my brother was ill eating was such a challenge for him.  It wasn't just the pain but also the lack of appetite, all the time balanced against the need to keep up his strength, to have the energy to go on.  With another family member now facing an equally tough challenge, food is going to be even harder to manage.  I'm working on a list of protein rich foods/dishes that are very gentle to eat, tasty and probably most important of all, tempting.  I want to look into eastern dishes that may fit the bill, things I'm not too familiar with, dishes like congee and silken tofu.  I'd love to hear if you have any recipes or ideas you could share, or even a book you could recommend.

So I'll cook, I'll package up small portions of foods I hope will tempt him to eat. Rich beef broth from roasted bones long made into a stock, small portions of cauliflower cheese, homemade chicken noodle soup with super soft vermicelli noodles.  I'll make mini panacottas, baked custards and jelly with poached fruits and hope he has the courage to try and in turn, to hopefully enjoy and have a moment's pleasure in an otherwise challenging day.

Food is love, so I intend to cook, a lot.

1023

After three whole days in the sun.

1022

After 7 hours in direct, hot sun.

1021

 Hot days = lots of drying time = homegrown sun dried tomatoes = happy tummy = happy me.

1019

It's really hot in Melbourne right now.  Very humid and just yuck.  I am sure that many in cooler climes may think I'd kill for some sunshine, in which case these photos will have to act as a virtual postcard holiday for you!

I'm not a big ice cream girl, but the gelati from here is tooooo gooood!  Coffee is my flavour, it is delicious and I have been thinking about it a lot since our last visit, even a late night drive doesn't put me off.  It's on the other side of the CBD for us, a drive down the freeway and through, a good half hour away, so not a spur of the moment weeknight stop.  With another teacher's strike today (don't get me started on that!) and the temp rising, we took my parents for a late morning lick!

I had to giggle when I overheard Leila talking to my mum about what flavour she was going to have.  Very earnestly she said to mum "Nan, definitely don't have the coffee, definitely not, it makes mum go crazy."  Now my mum is a coffee lover and thought that meant it was too strong rather than the reality of me obsessing (going crazy) over it because it was soooo good.  She therefore chose pistachio which was good but ....

My parents are so close to our girls, so devoted and engaged with them.  My head spins hearing both girls talking about them both at the same time, so animated and so loud, but my parents rarely bat an eyelid, taking it all in and enjoying every moment.

The relationship they share with my parents adds so much to their lives, has helped form them and given them a greater sense of security than they would otherwise have had.  We're all very lucky to have them play such a large and involved role in our lives.

988

Cherries, summertime, delicious and utterly gorgeous.

960

So many months, such little onions.  They're drying on the verandah, not enough of them, nor big enough to plait, but that is added to the one day list.  One day I shall have a garden large enough to have a whole bed of onions and they will grow to be big and full and I will have a store cupboard full of them!

913

It's that time of year, warm desserts that remind me of my childhood.  To be honest none of us really eat  much dessert here, but as with all sweet things, I do so love preparing them.  This will be a first for the girls, baked apples and I wonder if they'll find them as decadent as I did.  I remember sucking on the skin after all the puffed up flesh was eaten, loving what some would consider the leftovers as much as the rest of it.  I feel the same about double baked potatoes, the crunchy skin being the best bit that I save for last.

You may have noticed that I'm tweaking with my format.  I'm not happy with it, but I find it hard to move things about.  I had the same look for 5 years and realise that Blogger has moved forward in terms of options, where I haven't.  I'll keep on the case, see if I can't smarten myself up a bit.

905

When I was a pre-teen, a couple (or so) decades ago, I found the idea of a packet cake mix a novelty.  My mother made everything from scratch because she just did and I suspect it was probably the less expensive option.  For me, packet cake mixes held great allure, they were something the other kids had in their homes. Now of course I appreciate the lessons learned from my mother's necessity and in turn love, but then I just wanted a White Wings cake.

I'm not sure if they still make this one, but White Wings used to make a cinnamon tea cake.  It had the cake mix in the larger packet and smaller packet with the cinnamon sugar mix.  You baked the cake, drizzled it with melted butter, then covered with the contents of that little white packet.

The cake was quite flat and didn't rise much, being almost completely smooth.  I've never been a binge eater, but I remember that cake, eating it hot, that it's substance was almost nothing, meaning you were cutting a second sliver before you'd swallowed the first.

This cake is a combination of my memory and modern day habits.  It's quick and easy, smells delicious and has such a fine, soft, light crumb that tonight, when I cut Geoff and I equal pieces to have after dinner, I actually jammed - yes jammed - a secret smaller piece in my mouth before I left the kitchen!  I've never been a binge eater, but this cake encourages at least a second sneaky bite.

886

As I was considering this post I wondered if it was correct to categorise it as a bragging post, but then thought no, it's all about positive affirmation for me, as a mother.

It's very easy to judge ourselves harshly, as mothers.  I imagine there might be some women out there who are confident of the job that they do, who rarely or never experience self doubt, or concern that they are damaging their children in some way, but I'm not one of them.  I actually, and this is as close to bragging as I'll get, I actually think I do a pretty good job.  How do I judge that?  Well, my girls are firstly happy, for the majority of the time.  We spend a lot of time together, happily, and I consider them both articulate, sociable, polite children and I guess I acknowledge that I (and of course Geoff) have had a lot to do with that.  Even with all that good stuff, I still worrying I'm doing things wrong.

So, with that in mind....  Yesterday Leila's kinder group hosted a Mother's Day morning tea.  The children made scones, whipped the jam, set the little tables with tablecloths and arranged vases of flowers for us.  We had a little music performance then shared their cooking together, all very pleasant.  The highlight, however, was in a display book that their wonderful teacher, Miss Annette, had put together.  For each child there were two pages.  On the left was a picture painted by each child of their mother - Leila is a really good drawer so it was almost a mirror image of me, aside of course from the purple hair and bright red cheeks!  The entertaining page (and p.a. side of things) was to the right of the painting.  Each child had been asked the same questions by Miss Annette and she had recorded their answers for all to see.  I don't yet have the copy so can only share a few key answers that I remember.

Q  What is your mummy's favourite thing to do?
A   Spend time with me and Ella.

Q   What makes your mummy most happy?
A    Spending time with me, dadda and Ella.

Q   What do you and your mummy do together?
A   All sorts of things.  We do sewing, gardening, we make bread (I love my mum's bread), we play monopoly, and I like to make up soup recipes with my mum which I make and mummy drinks. (hence the photo above)

Q    What does your mummy smell like?
A     Perfume.

Q    How old is your mummy?
A    Something like 32.

Clearly the last two questions are lovely from a vanity perspective, but the others I found really telling.  I looked at some of the other mum's comments and some of them, well I felt so sorry for the mums and for the children if the answers were accurate.  One stuck out when asked "what do you do together?" and the child answered "nothing, mummy's always tired from tidying up all the mess I make so she just likes to watch tele".

Now I know that children don't always present things EXACTLY as they are, but for me, I found this really, really the greatest gift of all.  Forget what anyone else thinks because honestly, what my three best guys think is what matters most to me.  But really, my littlest girl thinks that the most important things to me are being with her, just spending time together and that's what makes me happiest.  You know what she's right and I feel great to know that she knows it.

871

Lunch with my parents tomorrow. They provide the lovely venue and we'll bring the food. I know lamb is popular for Easter but I'm not a big fan, finding any red meat very rich. Instead we'll have a Spanish style braise of chicken with loads of garlic, olive oil and white wine, served with a saffron pilaf and a dressed salad. For dessert, I know I must sound like a killjoy, but I'm not so fond of chocolate! However, there will be vanilla and orange poached pears with a macadamia and muscavado crumble and for those who so desire, a hot fudge sauce. Sounds pretty good to someone who's only had savoy crackers and cheese for lunch!

865

A crazy 700kms driven in a 24 hour period.

Dear friends celebrated their 40th in Wodonga so we left the girls with my parents and made friends with the freeway. A mad dash but worth the effort.


Home again with our babes. Family dinner finished off with homemade choc chips. There is also some vanilla icecream in the freezer, we could sandwich them together, but I think that idea would give daddy heart failure!

842

These holidays are going super fast.

We've entertained ourselves in all sorts of ways. The girls have had a few sleepovers with my parents which means Geoff and I got to the movies two weeks in a row. The first week The Skin I Live In - really really strange, but in a good strange way, if that makes sense. Creepy though without fear... The second week The Ides of March, also good but mostly for the two dreamboats of different eras, a film with flaws.

The girls and I have watched a few Harry Potter movies - every time Ella finishes a book we get to see the movie and she's been devouring them. We've crafted, we've rode and scootered every day. Ella's had a terrible scooter tumble and also had a wart frozen off.

I've had my hair coloured, but not cut. I've been walking a lot, only yesterday did 7.8kms of hilly walks in Healesville, would be lovely to do that every day.



I've made jam and chutney, I've made cakes, bagels and bread.

We're now getting ready for a week at the beach, we've rented a shack down the coast, which is not something we usually do at this absurdly high weekly rate time of year, but hey, you only get one shot so why not.

839

I figured out that the last time I gutted a fish was in 1993 at Sprouce Coulee in Cypress Hills Provincial Park, Alberta Canada.

I was dating and living with my then Park Ranger and we'd gone camping near his parents, on the banks of this gorgeous lake.

We borrowed his dad's canoe and were the only ones on the water. I don't remember it being summer, but it was sunny and warm. I have a photo somewhere of him paddling at the end of the canoe, it was like an Indian canoe, quite wide and deep. He then took a photo of me lounging back reading the latest Bon Appetit and Gourmet. Occasionally I'd look over the side and trail my hand across the surface of the water. Out the back I could see his spinners trawling through the water and occasionally a fish chasing madly after it.


We caught fish that day and I gutted my first fish. We were the only ones there and bbqed our fish over the fire we lit when the sun started to go down.

Today the story isn't quite so romantic. The fish were already dead when I bought them but I did gut them myself. Some things you just never forget.

835

One of my quirks, not a particularly classy one, is that I like my poached eggs (very soft poached eggs) with a little ketchup. I squeeze a round blob right on the centre, on top, then slice it through the eggs and kind of mash it around until mixed to a lovely shade of orangey red, then I gobble it up.

813

Sunday morning breakfast at our place.

804

One bowl of homemade pesto, so many memories.

Over 16 years ago, when Geoff and I had decided we were officially going out, he met my parents. We had dinner at Toofeys in Carlton. That was the first time I ate and liked olives, Geoff and my parents also. Small tasty ligurian olives.

When we were first married and travelling around Europe on our honeymoon, we were in Italy when the new olive oils were released. We were in a small village, perhaps Vinci, and they were releasing the new olive oils. There were a few local producers who had set up stands within the shadow of the town's church. There was a charcoal grill where they toasted bread, bruschetta. At the end a lady picked the pieces, rubbed a garlic clove across them, tossed them on a plastic plate and passed them to the next lady who liberally doused them with the vivid green olive and handed them to us. No hard sell, just taste. Peppery, grassy, olivey absolutely delicious, our first taste of new season's oil.

A trip with Geoff's parents through Provence, gosh in the early 2000's. A visit to Arles and the linen bought from a store near the bull ring.

My first herb and vegetable gardens, my own, growing basil, the pleasure the joy of making pesto myself, although my mum's is still better.

These are some of the reasons why food brings me so much job. Thankfully I can resist the eating, keep that within check, but it's the making and the memories that brings, that keep me in the kitchen.

783

Of course there was food and plenty of frosty drinks. I intended to photograph a lot of the lovely dishes we ate, but to be honest, everything was so yummy that I was spending my time eating over photographing!

781

There were street stalls.