Thursday, June 20, 2013


I've said in the past that I keep this blog for me and mine.  Because of that I've been absent of late because life and the loss of it has kept us otherwise occupied.  I also share this because I want to remember, for us, for me and mine.

Yesterday we farewelled my brother in law at an amazing service.  A chapel overflowing with hundreds of people whose lives he touched.  Two of his brothers spoke so beautifully of the one they lost.  My sister in laws best friend since primary school, more of a sister and extra member of our family, spoke of their life together since they'd met 30 years ago and the life they'd built together.  My nephew, a boy of only 16 years, stood up in front of many who'd known and loved his father and spoke so clearly, so eloquently of his dad that he had us all in awe.  He stood before us a tangible representation of his father, of what he stood for, of what he valued most highly in his life and wanted for his family.  He spoke of honoring his father, of being a man his father would be proud of by helping to guide and care for his mother and sister, it was heartwarming and breaking at the same time.

We joined together after, raised a glass to Flatty and began to face the reality of what life means without him, after the emotion of the funeral, when life calms and is still and and he's no longer here.

He Is Gone

You can shed tears that he is gone
Or you can smile because he has lived

You can close your eyes and pray he will come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left
Your heart can be empty because you can't see him
Or you can be full of the love you shared

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday
You can remember him and only that he is gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on

You can cry, close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what he would want

Smile, open your eyes, love and go on

1 comment:

Julia said...

What a beautiful picture of that sunny day you farewelled your BIL. His funeral service sounds amazing. I loved the poem. Hits a nerve with current or old grief - universal in its truth. Hugs to you my friend. xxx