Have you ever travelled overseas on on your own? Purely on your own, finding your way, marvelling at the world and all that you're seeing for the first time? Can you remember that feeling, a mixture of invincibility, passion, excitement, as if anything were possible? You travel for an extended period and I think it's that more than anything that you're trying to hang onto. It's a hard feeling to describe, for me at least, a little like falling in love, that heady mixture of lust and longing that overpowers youand takes you breathe away. The trip ends and you promise yourself that you'll find a way to keep that feeling in your life, so that it never leaves you and life always looks so full of possibility.
I have this feeling wash over me from time to time, today is one of those times. My small family are out and my favourite music is on, loud, and I have a desire to run. I don't want to run away from anyone, but to run to that something that pulls at my chest.
It's a longing for all I think of, dream of, want from this life of mine. It's wanting to see something new, to lie in a field when a storm is raging around me, it's wanting to paint a picture and have people look at it, it's wanting to fall in love with my love all over again. It's intoxicating and I wish I could hold onto it and do something amazing when it overtakes me again.